First off, I hear you. My wife did 7 years for armed robbery - she was young, caught up with the wrong people, and it went bad. She’s out now, doing good, but I’ve heard every story from her lips, so I’ll share it straight, no fluff

It’s scary at first. My wife told me the first few weeks are the hardest - not just 'cause of the place, but 'cause your whole identity gets stripped. You ain’t you no more; you’re a DOC number, a last name on a jumpsuit.

She said you don’t have to act hard, but you better act smart. Don’t gossip. Don’t get too friendly too fast. Don’t borrow anything. Don’t talk about your case unless you’re okay with everyone knowing it. Women’s prisons got politics too - sometimes more emotional, sometimes more manipulative. But respect still runs everything.

She also said you gotta find a routine. Whether it’s working in the kitchen, reading, exercising, or even praying - anything to keep your mind straight. The ones who just sit and wait to get out? They crack.

And yeah, there’s drama. There’s fights. There’s guards who treat you like trash, and some who treat you like you’re invisible. But she made friends too. Real ones. Women who looked out for each other, who had each other’s backs when it mattered.

She told me the worst part wasn’t even the cell - it was missing her people. But you got folks on the outside who care? That’s your anchor. She said even one letter from home could shift a whole week

So is it bad? Yeah. It’s prison. It ain’t supposed to be easy. But is it survivable? Hell yes. She made it out stronger, smarter, and with a whole new level of no-bullshit strength. You got that in you too - even if you don’t feel it yet

Just walk in knowing who you are. You don’t gotta prove nothing. You just gotta hold on to your peace and protect it at all costs

From a man who married a warrior